This is what Swedish women want?
The 1 Easy Idea You Can Use Today…To Unlock His Undying Devotion?
Women across the world make one universal mistake with men.?
Men fall for women because of how those women make them feel.?
You can thank him warmly for every single thing he does for you.?
But the more you appreciate him…The more he appreciates YOU.?
Inevitably, the subject turns to sex and marriage. I'll never forget asking one group what they thought of marriage in a country where most educated young people (and half go to university) don't get married or bear children until they are well over 30. A young woman gave me a thoughtful answer and so I asked her, "What are you looking for in a husband?" Without batting an eye or pausing for thought, she answered: "Three things. One, he must be good in bed. Two, he must be a good father. Three, when we divorce, he mustn't be bitter."
These three answers aren't all that surprising. Sweden has taken the ideal of individual autonomy further than most other countries. The Swedish girl is basically following the state ideology: she is saying that her future husband must follow the rules of autonomy.
The Swedes decided decades ago that the traditional male career role was the privileged autonomous one. Therefore, they set themselves the aim of overthrowing traditional gender roles. Women were to follow a traditional male career path and men were to spend just as much time as women mothering children.
The result was that women no longer needed men as protectors and providers. They would be kept secure by the social welfare state and for the short time they spent at home with their children they would be supported by a paid maternity leave scheme.
But if men are no longer required as protectors and providers then what are they good for? Well, there is still the sex drive to connect men and women. The sex drive by itself doesn't really lead on to marriage (but rather to promiscuous relationships) so it's not surprising to learn that Swedes marry very late if at all.
Nonetheless, sex is still permissible under the rules of autonomy, so it's still there on the Swedish woman's list of what men are good for.
So is fatherhood, but understood the Swedish way. A "good father" means a father who takes over half of the traditional female role. That is why Jonathan Power notes that,
most Swedish men push the pram, do the nappies, get up in the night and help clean the house. Many, too, take at least six months off to look after the baby while the woman goes back to work.
Again, a man who agrees to this is acting in line with the state policy of autonomy, in which gender roles are abolished in favour of a single unisex role.
Finally, for women to be autonomous they have to be able to determine, without impediment, whom they will live with. They must, therefore, be able to freely divorce. If you agree freely to your wife divorcing you, you are acting according to the rules of autonomy. So, again, it makes sense that our Swedish woman should have, as a test of a future husband, the idea that he would divorce without bitterness.
So our young Swedish woman is strongly influenced by state policy, enough to give voice to it spontaneously in her responses. But I very much doubt that this is the end of the story.
Most women are attracted to masculine qualities in a man. When monogamy begins to break down, and women revert even more strongly to hypergamy - to a desire to be with a rare "alpha" male - the emphasis on masculine qualities in a man will be even greater.
So our Swedish woman is likely to want contradictory things. At one level, she wants to follow the system and so insists that her future husband accept an androgynous role. It is most probable, though, that she will be attracted to men who show some kind of masculine drive or strength of principle or who have demonstrated some kind of effectiveness in the world.
It must be a difficult game to play for Swedish men. You would have to genuflect to one ideal, whilst carrying through with another. Presumably it all creates a certain level of confusion and discontent
The guy with the gorgeous floppy hair, quirky smile, and big heart devoted entirely to one person and one person only:
His girlfriend.
You’re so glad she found him, but honestly?
You are so insanely jealous. It’s hard to stop watching them. The way he’s so attentive to her needs. The way they seem to share thoughts without speaking. The way he wraps his arms around her so tightly it’s like they’re one body. Watching them makes you ache. Because the guy at your side doesn’t treat you like that.
It’s not that your guy isn’t wonderful. Of course he’s wonderful. It’s more…
How he treats you. He treats you like someone he’s gotten used to.
You know he doesn’t wake up in the morning pinching himself for being lucky enough to snag someone like you.
But you bet that’s what this other guy does. You can see it in his eyes.
The pleasure that radiates from his smile every time he looks at the woman he loves.
So you ask her—half-joking, half-hoping—if he has any brothers. She just laughs.
“Nah, that’s not what you need.” She leans towards you and glances around to make sure no one’s listening. “Want to hear a secret?”
You nod eagerly.
She whispers, “Our relationship was just like everyone else’s before. But then I found out about this crazy secret. It’s from this relationship coach named James Bauer. It’s, like, the key to unlocking men.”
You nod even more vigorously, but she’s stopped talking. You follow her gaze across the room. Her boyfriend is holding up a drink, asking her wordlessly if she wants one. She shakes her head, blows him a kiss, and turns back to you. “So, do you want to know what it is?”
“Yeah!” you say. “If it will help me and my guy read each other’s minds, like you two just did.”
“Okay, then listen closely…”
If you see a woman with a man trailing behind her like a puppy dog, common wisdom says you can be sure she has something you don’t.
It’s such an obvious explanation and yet…
It’s dead wrong.
That woman?
She’s no more exceptional than you. (Whatever THAT means.)
But what she does have is a very special understanding of men.
She understands that what matters most is NOT what he sees when he looks at her…
But how he sees himself reflected in her eyes.
The truth is this:
He can’t help it.
Most women don’t have that effect on him.
When he’s around most women, he feels like a dumb guy. Like he’s always doing something wrong. Like he needs a nanny to look after him.
He can count on one hand the number of women who look up to him. Who really, really respect him.
And he’s always going to have a place in his life for those women.
So, how do you make a man feel like a hero?
It sounds kind of silly.
Do you have to engineer some kind of scenario where he has to save kids from a burning house or a little old lady from getting hit by a car?
No. It’s a lot simpler than that.
To make your man feel like a hero, there’s one easy thing you can do starting right now:
Thank him.
Did he clear the dishes off the table?
Thank him.
Did he drive you to a meeting?
Thank him.
He’s a hero to you every day, even though you may not see it like that.
Has your man “rescued you”—metaphorically speaking—any time in the last week?
Maybe he dropped everything to help you. Maybe he was there when you needed a sounding board.
Maybe his advice helped you make a difficult decision.
We tend to take those things for granted. We expect it. It numbs us to the actual miracle of having someone to rely on.
Most women think they can earn a man’s appreciation by doing lots of things for him.
They’ve got it backwards.
The best way to earn a man’s appreciation is to appreciate everything he does for you, no matter how little.
It triggers his “Hero Instinct.”
Women across the world make one universal mistake with men.?
Men fall for women because of how those women make them feel.?
You can thank him warmly for every single thing he does for you.?
But the more you appreciate him…The more he appreciates YOU.?
This is what Swedish women want?
Jonathan Power teaches at a university in Lund, Sweden. After lectures he likes to take his students out for a drink and a chat:Inevitably, the subject turns to sex and marriage. I'll never forget asking one group what they thought of marriage in a country where most educated young people (and half go to university) don't get married or bear children until they are well over 30. A young woman gave me a thoughtful answer and so I asked her, "What are you looking for in a husband?" Without batting an eye or pausing for thought, she answered: "Three things. One, he must be good in bed. Two, he must be a good father. Three, when we divorce, he mustn't be bitter."
These three answers aren't all that surprising. Sweden has taken the ideal of individual autonomy further than most other countries. The Swedish girl is basically following the state ideology: she is saying that her future husband must follow the rules of autonomy.
The Swedes decided decades ago that the traditional male career role was the privileged autonomous one. Therefore, they set themselves the aim of overthrowing traditional gender roles. Women were to follow a traditional male career path and men were to spend just as much time as women mothering children.
The result was that women no longer needed men as protectors and providers. They would be kept secure by the social welfare state and for the short time they spent at home with their children they would be supported by a paid maternity leave scheme.
But if men are no longer required as protectors and providers then what are they good for? Well, there is still the sex drive to connect men and women. The sex drive by itself doesn't really lead on to marriage (but rather to promiscuous relationships) so it's not surprising to learn that Swedes marry very late if at all.
Nonetheless, sex is still permissible under the rules of autonomy, so it's still there on the Swedish woman's list of what men are good for.
So is fatherhood, but understood the Swedish way. A "good father" means a father who takes over half of the traditional female role. That is why Jonathan Power notes that,
most Swedish men push the pram, do the nappies, get up in the night and help clean the house. Many, too, take at least six months off to look after the baby while the woman goes back to work.
Again, a man who agrees to this is acting in line with the state policy of autonomy, in which gender roles are abolished in favour of a single unisex role.
Finally, for women to be autonomous they have to be able to determine, without impediment, whom they will live with. They must, therefore, be able to freely divorce. If you agree freely to your wife divorcing you, you are acting according to the rules of autonomy. So, again, it makes sense that our Swedish woman should have, as a test of a future husband, the idea that he would divorce without bitterness.
So our young Swedish woman is strongly influenced by state policy, enough to give voice to it spontaneously in her responses. But I very much doubt that this is the end of the story.
Most women are attracted to masculine qualities in a man. When monogamy begins to break down, and women revert even more strongly to hypergamy - to a desire to be with a rare "alpha" male - the emphasis on masculine qualities in a man will be even greater.
So our Swedish woman is likely to want contradictory things. At one level, she wants to follow the system and so insists that her future husband accept an androgynous role. It is most probable, though, that she will be attracted to men who show some kind of masculine drive or strength of principle or who have demonstrated some kind of effectiveness in the world.
It must be a difficult game to play for Swedish men. You would have to genuflect to one ideal, whilst carrying through with another. Presumably it all creates a certain level of confusion and discontent
The 1 Easy Idea You Can Use Today…To Unlock His Undying Devotion?
You know that girlfriend of yours who has the perfect boyfriend?The guy with the gorgeous floppy hair, quirky smile, and big heart devoted entirely to one person and one person only:
His girlfriend.
You’re so glad she found him, but honestly?
You are so insanely jealous. It’s hard to stop watching them. The way he’s so attentive to her needs. The way they seem to share thoughts without speaking. The way he wraps his arms around her so tightly it’s like they’re one body. Watching them makes you ache. Because the guy at your side doesn’t treat you like that.
It’s not that your guy isn’t wonderful. Of course he’s wonderful. It’s more…
How he treats you. He treats you like someone he’s gotten used to.
You know he doesn’t wake up in the morning pinching himself for being lucky enough to snag someone like you.
But you bet that’s what this other guy does. You can see it in his eyes.
The pleasure that radiates from his smile every time he looks at the woman he loves.
So you ask her—half-joking, half-hoping—if he has any brothers. She just laughs.
“Nah, that’s not what you need.” She leans towards you and glances around to make sure no one’s listening. “Want to hear a secret?”
You nod eagerly.
She whispers, “Our relationship was just like everyone else’s before. But then I found out about this crazy secret. It’s from this relationship coach named James Bauer. It’s, like, the key to unlocking men.”
You nod even more vigorously, but she’s stopped talking. You follow her gaze across the room. Her boyfriend is holding up a drink, asking her wordlessly if she wants one. She shakes her head, blows him a kiss, and turns back to you. “So, do you want to know what it is?”
“Yeah!” you say. “If it will help me and my guy read each other’s minds, like you two just did.”
“Okay, then listen closely…”
Women across the world make one universal mistake with men.
It’s not their fault. They’re just following common wisdom. Common wisdom says that men only fall for exceptional women. (Exceptional bodies, mainly.)If you see a woman with a man trailing behind her like a puppy dog, common wisdom says you can be sure she has something you don’t.
It’s such an obvious explanation and yet…
It’s dead wrong.
That woman?
She’s no more exceptional than you. (Whatever THAT means.)
But what she does have is a very special understanding of men.
She understands that what matters most is NOT what he sees when he looks at her…
But how he sees himself reflected in her eyes.
The truth is this:
Men fall for women because of how those women make them feel.
When a man feels like a hero in a woman’s eyes, he swears his undying loyalty to her.He can’t help it.
Most women don’t have that effect on him.
When he’s around most women, he feels like a dumb guy. Like he’s always doing something wrong. Like he needs a nanny to look after him.
He can count on one hand the number of women who look up to him. Who really, really respect him.
And he’s always going to have a place in his life for those women.
So, how do you make a man feel like a hero?
It sounds kind of silly.
Do you have to engineer some kind of scenario where he has to save kids from a burning house or a little old lady from getting hit by a car?
No. It’s a lot simpler than that.
To make your man feel like a hero, there’s one easy thing you can do starting right now:
You can thank him warmly for every single thing he does for you.
Did he offer to get you a drink?Thank him.
Did he clear the dishes off the table?
Thank him.
Did he drive you to a meeting?
Thank him.
He’s a hero to you every day, even though you may not see it like that.
Has your man “rescued you”—metaphorically speaking—any time in the last week?
Maybe he dropped everything to help you. Maybe he was there when you needed a sounding board.
Maybe his advice helped you make a difficult decision.
We tend to take those things for granted. We expect it. It numbs us to the actual miracle of having someone to rely on.
But the more you appreciate him…The more he appreciates YOU.
Now, that’s not how most people think.Most women think they can earn a man’s appreciation by doing lots of things for him.
They’ve got it backwards.
The best way to earn a man’s appreciation is to appreciate everything he does for you, no matter how little.
It triggers his “Hero Instinct.”
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